Leigh'ism

The second I step inside the door, or the second she steps out the door at her home, Leigh bombards me with her not so pleasant choices, inappropriate actions, and downright devilish deeds.  It is as if I'm Mother Teresa and she has to confess and get it off her chest.  But there are times that it is hard for me to detect a sorryful expression and it could easily be confused for a proud moment and she is bragging about what she has done to something or someone.  These actions could be something she had torn up, broken, a screaming/yelling episode, or a physical encounter with her assistants.   There were times that these confessions went on for an hour or more...and she was doing all the talking!  In my attempt to turn this around to a more positive way of thinking and discourage her from bragging about what all she had done, I told her I would only listen to three confessions, and for each confession she has to tell me something positive she has done to erase the undesirable deed.  This has worked somewhat, but Leigh is clever enough to work this rule to her benefit.

In the beginning, Leigh would hide her face when I put on my stern expression, held up one finger, and clearly stated, "That's ONE!"  She would then tell me a good deed whether she had done it or not. I learned to check her story before I gave her credit.  As time went on,  Leigh would start confessing, put up a finger(s) and start her own count.  There was one occasion when we were driving in the car, I had a little road rage, and she looked at me, stuck her index finger up, an and stated, "That's ONE!"

When her confessions begin to outnumber her good deeds, Leigh has a persuasive way of 'whitewashing' what she has done.  Today while on our Saturday outing, Leigh let go of a couple of her blood-curdling war whoops.  Realizing that the count was about to begin, Leigh immediately looked at me and stated, "Have happy episode!"  I cut my eyes at her and stated that it didn't sound too happy to me. She responded with, "Just little happy episode....not big happy."  Yes, my poker face melted and as hard as I tried not to laugh, I lost it.  Leigh, you outsmarted me again. 

Mirror Mirror on the wall......the most rotten stinker of them all!